Daisy: Everyone keeps asking what a border commuter is…HUH. Funny, considering how often I get reminded. Maybe it’s time YOU started keeping up too.
Mexican nationals who live in the US-Mexico border and wish to attend a border university but cannot afford or are unable to reside in the sister city to their hometown may attend any US institution within 75 miles of the physical border to become a border commuter. Border commuters can choose between part-time or full-time status and are expected to periodically renew their paperwork in order to maintain legal status.
This to be able to cross international bridges from their hometown to their college campus inside the neighboring country and return by the end of the day without spending more than 24 hours at a time on the US side.
2019 was a year that marked everyone's lives. As I started the third semester of my undergraduate degree, I was very excited but also a bit weary, as the immigrant crisis had had important surges. Anchor on TV: "It's been another record year for migration at the US Southern border. Migrants attempt to cross at many stretches along the border, but nowhere is busier year-round than El Paso, Texas." Daisy: Which meant more time on the bridge and more time through inspections.
The spring semester flew by because I kept working part-time in Juarez after school, meaning that when I chose my classes, I was also limited on time because I had to commute.
I also learned from my office of international programs that I did not need to take summer classes to maintain status, something that was a habit from the time that I was in EPCC.
Summer was a fever dream of scarce commuting and mostly socializing in Juarez with my co-workers and childhood friends. It felt quite peaceful not having to walk the border so early in the morning and run back.
But at the end of my days, I always felt like I missed listening to the language and being immersed in the college community.
In 2019, I turned 24, and even though I was proud of being a college student and a border commuter, there was no denying the shame that would creep every time a friend would tell me that they were graduating from college back home in Juarez. In being a border commuter, your part-time status limits the number of classes you're able to take, meaning that your degree prolongs,
and well, that always puts you behind. You constantly feel behind. You also feel like there's no clear vision of where you might end up. As being a student takes you only so far. And while people around always have encouraging words, it is you who has to stay motivated and accept that everything will take a bit longer and hopefully will be worth it in the end.
When summer ran out, it was back to waking up early to wait at the bridge and rush again.
But by the end of 2019, some news broke out and the world changed for everyone. TV Anchor on TV: "Well, thanks so much...
TV Anchor on TV: ...I'd like to start out by saying it's a difficult and uncertain time. The US has been implementing an aggressive containment strategy that requires..." Daisy: The center for disease control and prevention reported by the end of that year on a pneumonia like illness that was not responding to treatment and cases were yet to be confirmed. People expected the worst.
In my case, I wanted to fool myself because I knew the states had top-notch resources. So I strongly believed since the reports came back from all the way to China, that we were safe and this would go away super soon. Boy, was I wrong. My 2020 spring semester was filled with lots of uncertainty.
On January 1st, the CDC reported the lockdown of Wuhan, an 11 million people city in China, because of the coronavirus outbreak, which put everybody under stress. Given that flying across countries is not unheard of, and it was a fear that travelers who had come in contact with the virus were actively carrying it to their respective destinations.
Meanwhile, we watched the news back home, and I tried my hardest to stay positive, turning in assignments for my creative writing class and still working part-time. On March 13, 2020, the first case of coronavirus was confirmed in El Paso. Anchor on TV: "The judge and I have been informed that we have a presumptive positive here in El Paso." Daisy: Two days later, a case was reported in Ciudad Juarez.
And on March 21st, the United States and Mexico agreed to close the borders to everything that was non-essential. And suddenly, my college education was categorized as non-essential. Amid the uncertainty, the office of International Programs would send out mass emails to make sure everyone was in the loop of border restrictions.
And with that came the first email, which stated that while border commuters did have a reason to cross the border, the office could not guarantee this was actually possible. My world crumbled. Some of the border commuters tried to stay positive by looking on the bright side of what the pandemic brought. Alfredo(border commuter): During the pandemic, I started going to UTEP.
Alfredo(border commuter): It was the first time I got my I-20 emailed to me, which hadn't been done before. I always had to go and pick it up, printed. So I didn't have to worry about crossing or anything like that. Daisy: Thankfully for me, I was never sent back when I had to cross during the pandemic. I do remember one week I was very carefully patted down 3 days in a row, and at that point, I felt we were very close intimate friends.
As another safety measure, even though the office of international programs could not guarantee our entry to the country, they sent down in one of the mass emails a document stating that whoever carried that letter was an enrolled student and how had a reason to cross. So basically, I had to carry yet another piece of paper to enter the US.
In one instance, I was sent into inspection because a CBP officer was certain that no more students were crossing. So they called my college and let me cross before saying that I shouldn't because there was COVID. And all I knew was that I had classes to go to and buses to take.
Like me, Alfredo went through a little bit of a bad encounter. Alfredo(border commuter): The first time I crossed, they stopped me, and they were just checking absolutely everything on my I-20, and I remember the border patrol was calling a number on my I-20 and I overheard them say “yeah, they're not answering…” You know, and I was like “oh my God, did UTEP screw me over” but no, they let me go.
COVID sent everyone to virtual learning. And this brought my intent to build a friend network in El Paso to complete shambles. All the years I had been exposed to someone else's culture came to a stop for an entire year. 2020 was one of the most isolating years I've had.
And not just because of the pandemic restrictions, but because I had already assimilated so much of the American culture, and caging myself on the opposite side of everything I knew for the last seven years felt very heavy. During pandemic, finals looked a lot different, and classes would have a last meeting where the comments would end up in “Let's hope we go back to normal soon.”
And to this day, I don't think my classmates knew what the couple of hours that we would spend in front of the computer meant to me. They felt like a lifeline that kept me exposed to the language, the people, and the culture I had so much love for. Pandemic to so many meant staying home, but to me, it meant staying far away from the place that actually felt like it.
On June 22nd of 2020, President Donald Trump issued an executive order that many of us misunderstood as an intent to limit international student visas. I remember the emails from our international advisors trying to give us peace of mind, but during a couple of weeks, all I knew was that my visa was pending from a thread. And I wasn't the only border commuter feeling like this.
Liliana: I'm going to lose my status and I'm going to, you know, lose my mind. Daisy: On December 14th, 2020, Texas announced its vaccine rollout for COVID-19. And 10 days later, Juarez followed.
The border was over the moon. The sun would finally shine again. 2021 was a year that we got to see the light of day again. And in February, Texas schools went back to in-person instruction. UTEP welcome as students fully back on campus for the fall semester and I felt so relieved to finally see people on campus.
But after COVID-19 and the executive order scare, another problem came to the border. One that had been lurking for a while. Just in small amounts, the migrant caravans. Life went from not crossing to waiting on very VERY long lines because of the migrants who came from the South seeking asylum in the United States.
It was intimidating to see so many camping sites along the border and the reaction of law enforcement once you got to the ports of entry. More so because with the fall semester, and since I was still crossing by walking, I would often have to wait outside the Santa Fe Bridge. And I will look at the migrants waiting to be interviewed, covered with foil-like covers.
With the end of 2021 came the news that I would finally graduate in spring 2022. Ah, the joy, ah, the happiness, but also ah, the anxiety. Spending so much time in Juarez made me feel like I was losing focus,
...and when I spoke to my friends, it turned out my face expressed more than I was letting them know. Estefania: En el tema con el tipo de trabajo que teníamos es siempre poner una cara amable, una sonrisa y de cierta manera, pues para un estudiante a veces esa es actuación y para un estudiante internacional que tiene que cruzar la frontera, pues es el doble de actuación, porque estás muy cansado y tienes tarea y tienes pendientes y tienes hambre y muchas cosas. (The type of job we had was to always be nice, smile and in a way, for a student everything is acting, and for an international student who has to commute the border, it is double the acting because of how tired you are, how much homework, how many errands and how hungry you are, too many things.)
Shalma: Estábamos todos platicando y a lo mejor tú estabas fijamente viendo como a otro lado y ya era de que, "Oye, Daisy, ¿ tú qué piensas? Si tú eras así como "Ah, sorry, eh ¿qué estaban diciendo? ¿De qué están hablando? Ah, sí, estaban hablando de tal y ya retomabas. Entonces, sí escuchabas, pero a lo mejor tu atención estabas pensando en otras cosas que tenías que estar haciendo." (We would be talking and your sight would stare into the void and we were like “Hey Daisy, what do you think? And you were like “Ah, sorry, what were we talking about? Oh yeah” and then you would resume the conversation. So, while you were listening, your mind probably was on something else you needed to do.) Daisy: As border commuters, certain opportunities are a bit tricky.
Daisy: A fellow border commuter Luis explains a little bit about why. Luis: And it doesn't depend on my academic eh empeño como desarrollo, performance. It doesn't depend on my academic performance, but it depends depends on my citizenship. And this happened to me when looking for any internships while studying.
So when a fellow border commuter from one of my classes mentioned that he was under something called CPT, curricular practical training. I got curious. And after my curiosity came disappointment. Curricular practical training, or CPT, is a part-time work opportunity authorized by the Office of International Programs. This is a chance to give you a field experience before you graduate.
Since this is part-time, only 20 hours are permitted, and I would not be able to tell you about full-time since I never actually did either while doing my undergraduate degree. When my classmate mentioned that he was doing his CPT with an on-campus entity, I was flabbergasted. So, you're telling me that I could have been working all along, and I was not aware?
To be fair, I never really asked my office of international programs at UTEP, because EPCC would also never really mention an opportunity like this. And whenever job desire topics would be brought up in conversation, international advisors were quick to shut them off to remind me that I had only one job in the United States, which ironically was not a job at all.
After finding out about CPT and starting my last semester in 2022, several decisions had to be made before graduating.
And even though I was super excited, I also often got comments from people who thought I had already graduated because of how long I had been a student already. It is always “How long have you been studying in El Chuco now?” “Yo pensé que ya te habías graduado”. Why do you work in Juarez if you're already studying in El Paso?
People can't grasp the idea that studying in El Paso is one door that you manage to open, but that does not carry anything else. You have to knock on every other window. You have to scavenge for any scholarship or fellowship. There is no full pamphlet or guidebook to provide you with all the information available.
I remember back in the day, I used to treasure finding other border commuters because they gave me hope that I could accomplish things. It made me believe that even when I had not met many others, there were more out there, in the distance and time and space. They too felt lonely, just like me.